February 2012
23 posts
Everyone is devastated all over the place. I can just not comprehend ever openly talking about being even remotely heartbroken or whatever else. I mean it doesn’t bother me that people do, but personally just, fuck that. It just won’t ever happen. Queen of ignoring feelings since I learnt that I had them.
I have the most realistic dreams, mostly in the sense that I dream about things that are so stupid and insignificant so I can’t comprehend how they can’t actually be real/why my brain would have made up something so pointless.
So, it’s so damn slow.
Something has to change.
Oh my god body why are you trying to kill me
My best friend once told me her theory about life and death, that being that regardless of anything else, you only have a certain amount of heartbeats before you die. I know this might seem ridiculous, but I’ve decided that I am going to stop stressing purely for this reason. Feeling my heart beat out of my chest seems to mean nothing but terrible things. I guess this theory would also mean...
www.facebook.com/karlchristophmusic.
Oh my.
I wish my brain didn’t feel like it was about to explode. I just want to sleep properly. Half sleeps really aren’t cutting it anymore.
friend: 10 people have asked to be my valentine
me: sometimes i meow at cats and they meow back
I wanted so badly to lie down next to her on the couch, to wrap my arms around her and sleep. Not fuck, like in those movies. Not even have sex. Just sleep together, in the most innocent sense of the phrase. But I lacked the courage and she had a boyfriend and I was gawky and she was gorgeous and I was hopelessly boring and she was endlessly fascinating. So I walked back to my room and collapsed...
January 2012
17 posts
Oh and I had this hat that I lost in September, I miss you less than that, you know. How can a man seek revenge on a woman he wants to believe has no soul? No home.
Anna no, what an embarrassing way to go.
I graduate in ten months. This year is going to fly and then I am going to pack up my suitcase and my cat and go and see all of the pretty things in the world and never come back.
There are so many things that I could/should be doing today, but instead I am going to stay in bed and not talk to anyone because I cannot remember what a proper day off feels like and I think it’s about time I did something about that.
It’s like, when you know someone is lying but you just smile and agree with them so that you don’t have to talk about it. And you must seem like an idiot and you sure feel like an idiot, but sometimes its just easier that way.
Ten more minutes until I can next take my painkillers, these four hour gaps are hell and I would like for my skull to just be okay again.
Allllll of the foreign concepts. I take back everything I ever said, not knowing things rules and I wish for no one to ever tell me anything ever again.
There is no 'try'. You either do it, or you don't.
nedhepburn:
This one time I painted a living room with a girl.
This was a handful of years back. It was about eight months before the huge, flame-out of a breakup. That day, though? That day we painted the living room? It was pretty uneventful. We painted my parents living room for $50 between us and a pizza. That was it. I think we watched Anchorman or something after that.
But it still...
December 2011
14 posts
I wish I could have seen my family today, more than anything else.
I am so incredibly excited to start my new life. That could sound ridiculous because in reality I am only moving about five hundred metres from where I am now, but maybe five hundred metres is all I need to actually be happy.
I'm packing up my little life into a thousand...
This will be my third move in less than two years. Starting fresh is the worlds greatest feeling.
Even after all this time, the sun never says to the earth, “you owe me”. Look what happens with a love like that; it lights the whole sky.
I don't remember what sleep feels like.
Where did four years even go?
Where the hell are you?